Proposal for an addition to the Universal Catechism

It was not too many years ago when the vast majority of men did not begin a sentence with the word, "So," but like the rapid proliferation of shoppers who pull their shopping carts beside them rather than push them by the handles affixed to the back of the carts, the use of the word, "So," to begin a sentence has taken hold of our culture in much the same sad way that men once suddenly began to wear Nehru jackets.




Well, all of these actions should be considered sinful but the popularity of wearing Nehru Jackets has, like men wearing Dickeys, waned owing to Nehru dying.



As for the wearing of Dickeys, ABS is convinced we are not likely to see a return to that strange and irksome habit since "The Byrds" broke up.

Their first album was a big success with such songs as Turn, Turn, Turn, The Bells of Rhymney, Eight Miles High, and We call him Dickey, which was an insult directed at David Crosby for "being a Dick."

But that still leaves us with the problem of men who pull shopping carts alongside them rather than pushing them by the handle affixed to the back of the cart but that can be avoided by shopping solely at Amazon and having products dropped at your door step.

However, the idea that one can avoid men beginning many of their sentences with the word, "So," is an irrational and hopeless hope for that habit is all over men the way a Doberman is all over a pink chiffon wearing Bichon Frise that sashays across a lawn in front of it or the way Jerry Sandusky used to be all over a Boy Scout once the fires for the S'mores had been extinguished.

No, it seems we are doomed to hear this rebarbative speech pattern employed for some time to come and ABS desires it be labeled a venial sin for common usage and a mortal sin for any man who uses the word, "so," more than sixteen times in one day.




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