New Pledge of Allegiance

When one asks a fellow American, where were you and what were you doing during Operation Urgent Fury, the October 1983 American led invasion of Grenada?- most respond with an expression on their face that makes one think they had just been whacked in the back of the head with an invisible sack of frozen Cod Loins: Wait, what? We invaded Grenada? T’Hell?

Not many Americans remember the last of The POTUS Ronald Reagan’s great military successes and while few remember what they were doing during those first tense ten minutes of that invasion when many American troops were asking themselves, Why are we doing this? and  Man, did you think it’d be this humid?  ABS is sure they will remember what they were doing and thinking when they look back at V V Day (Victory over Virus Day) and, unless ABS is mistaken (unlikely) they will have emotions as mixed as the numerous cocktails they have been consuming daily.

Perhaps what the American Government has been doing during this manufactured panic will remind them of Mr. Sam Francis and his explanation of how the American government works to a visiting contingent of Russian officials:   In America there are two political parties.  The Republicans are the Stupid Party and The Democrats are the Evil Party and every once in a while they get together and do something really stupid and evil. We call that Bipartisanship.

Anticipating the inevitable America victory over virus, ABS knows that Americans will not be able to look back triumphantly to the photos of the virus singing a Treaty of Unconditional Surrender aboard The USNS Comfort and so he has taken it upon his own self to memorialise the pending victory by rewriting The Pledge of Allegiance so future American public school students will remember VV Day.

I pledge allegiance to The Fauci of the Locked Psychiatric Ward that is America and to the epidemiological models upon which he stands, one virus, Uber Alles, under fear, with rebarbative restrictions and suspected criminality for all.