Pope Plate Lip the first

Many men live lives of fear and trepidation because Our Pope and Our Cross has created a majority of Cardinals eligible to vote in the next Conclave.

Those men think that means the One True Holy Roman Catholic and Apostolic Church will have to suffer under another heterodox Papacy - a Pope Francis II.

Well, it could be worse and ABS is willing to bet it may well be worse.

Our Pope and Our Cross likes to pretend he is a simple and humble man, one who is liberated from such things as Clericalism, Canon Law, and Tradition, and so we must advance the time for cocktail hour to 9:00 am when we consider that Our Pope and Our Cross could chose to abdicate in an announcement that will read something like this:

Dear Captive Friends, fearful of having your sodomitic actions exposed, and other Curial Flunkies and what not.

As your simple and humble Pope, you know how open I am to the simple ways and simple days of the early church when men were still open to the promptings of the Holy Spirit who is always breathing newness into our old and crumbling institutions.

It was back in the early days that Pope Peter consecrated his successor, Linus, and so I want to dispense and do away with all of the costly and complicated canonical rigamarole of flying Cardinals to Rome to select my successor.

We are men of simple faith and we do not need endless page of rules and penalties to do what we all know must be done to  - to have a successor of mine who will continue on the path laid out by all the Popes following the New Church established  in 1962-1965 BCE (Bestest Council Ever). 

With that in mind, and with the sweet solace provided by The Amazonian Synod still comforting and encouraging all of us I, Pope Francis, announce today, August 19, 2020, that I will abdicate on the Feast of The Holy Ghost, August 25, 2020, that great Feast Day celebrated by our Portuguese brethern; Portugal, where Our Mother Mary appeared to the indigenous youngsters and made then all excited and famous.

On August 25 I will resign but I will not be going to join brother Benedict in the Old Pope's Home in Rome but I will be returning to my old stomping grounds in the slums of Argentina after consecrating Ropni Metuktire, the great leader of the Kayapo Tribe in Brazil as Bishop of Rome and Pope.

In doing that, I will ensure, for as far as one can see into the future, that the Face of The Catholic Church will be truly an Amazonian one.

Pray for me that my old shoes will hold out until I can make my way back to Argentina and have them repaired by my old cobbler friend, Ferdinand or whatever his name was.

Peace. I'm out...

Franciscus

             
                      Pope Plate Lip The First



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